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That's the reason you're here anyway, right?
Dear God,
Yes. My answer is yes. I’ve spent time doing things my way and I’ve found that in my hands things break, they fall, and they die; but God, when it is in your will, done your way and you breathe life into them... THEY FLOURISH and grow. They’re safe, they live... I’m safe... I grow! For that, I’m grateful. I thank you Lord! You, oh Lord, have been faithful. I don’t deserve it. I didn’t earn it but you still graced me. So yes to Your will and Your commands for my life! With a Sincere and Willing Heart, Your Daughter Deaundra
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You may be wondering why God has allowed you to suffer for so long and hasn't taken you out of your misery. Some of you may have considered doing the job yourself by suicide.😟You're wondering if God is real and if He loves you, then where is He? But hear me! There is PURPOSE in the SUFFERING!! 🗣️
It may not FEEL good but it's WORKING OUT for YOUR GOOD (Rom. 8:28). I don't know the plan God has for you but HE DOES (Jer. 29:11) and that's what matters. God doesn't allow us to suffer through trials and tribulations with no intent (James 1:2-3; Rom. 8:18). God's will is perfect. He will deliver you at an appointed time.🕛 He has you on His mind and He is concerned about you, just trust Him. "But, how do I endure all of this? It hurts. It's uncomfortable. People are watching me struggle and it's embarrassing. I have no fight left." Fast & Pray hard, even when it becomes hard to open your mouth to talk to Him. Commune with Him alone. Worship your way through. Separate yourself from all, except genuine prayer partners. You got this! Hang on in there!! It is in the 3rd Trimester that a pregnant woman becomes the most uncomfortable and impatient. She begins to lose sleep at night because she's so uncomfortable. Have you ever been there in the spirit?! Uncomfortable, restless, impatient, even annoyed😒.... AND READY TO GIVE BIRTH ALREADY! 😫
🗣️ Lord, I'm carrying this vision, this purpose, this load, and responsibility to safely deliver. I'm just waiting for the appointed to TIME (due date); but in the meantime, I'll allow it to grow and develop! Yeah...I look exhausted. You're having to adjust my mood. My walk is a little slower but if I have to WOBBLE to the deliver room, I'm going to get there! When I get to where you have called me to be, I will know that the carrying of the vision and the labor was all worth THE DELIVERY! Just to birth my purpose.... will all be worth it. 🙌 #WaitingOnGod #LaborPains#BirthTheVision To all who have lost someone near and dear... Be encouraged. I know it doesn't feel good to you. They may have left in a painful way but I heard someone say that there is no pain in death. Pain exists only during life. If the person(s) you mourn died in Christ, you can cry for you, but don't cry for them. They're better now. When I lost loved ones, I cried selfish tears. I wanted them here with me, to watch me live and to laugh with me, grow with me. I miss their laughs and fun times... but I don't miss their suffering. I thank God that their living wasn't up to me. I would've kept them here as long as I could even if it meant them suffering or struggling one more day. God knows best. I often hear my pastor say, "They wouldn't come back if they could." They're okay now. Whether they left abruptly, without warning or suffered for a while in sickness...they are okay now. No more sickness, no more suffering, no more struggling. Be encouraged.
I once read an article by Jada Pinkett Smith and she called Will’s oldest child her “Bonus-Son.” I love that. When I hear “bonus” I think of an additional and unexpected reward. The partnership between her and Trey’s mom, Sheree, is impeccable. According to Jada and Sheree in their recently aired Red Table Talk episode, it hasn’t always been easy and they haven’t always gotten along.
“A letter to a friend: Blended families are NEVER easy, but here’s why I don’t have a lot of sympathy for your situation because... we CHOOSE them. When I married Will, I knew Trey was part of the package...Period! If I didn’t want that...I needed to marry someone else. Then I learned if I am going to love Trey...I had to learn to love the most important person in the world to him...his mother. And the two of us may not have always LIKED each other... but we have learned to LOVE each other.” –Jada Pinkett Smith When I accepted my husband’s proposal I also vowed to love his children as my own and to care for them. I was 22 when we met and somewhat clueless as to what “LOVING THEM” meant. It is more that cooking for them, laughing with them, taking pictures, and hanging out. Relationships were rocky and my husband felt defeated in his fight for them and at points he would stop fighting. I thought preaching to him and badgering him would help him to want to rebuild. I wasn’t helping the situation at all. After about 4 years of being in his life, I learned to back off. I still would express my opinion but I had to learn when to leave it alone. One of my bonus babies is 5 ½ years old and I’ve been in her life for most of her life, so when things are rocky it affects me. How do I fix that? I learned to stop talking and start praying. I kind of feel like I tried too hard in the beginning. I mean, I was genuine but maybe I pushed too hard for a relationship or friendship with them. They’re beautiful children and so full of personality and character. Honestly, children are usually stuck in middle of adults who can’t seem to get along or agree to co-parent effectively and they feel pulled in different directions. We fail to realize that our feelings and frustrations are irrelevant when it comes to our babies. I have always been open and willing to being THAT bonus mom. Anyway, what have I learned from being a “Bonus Mom” in the last 6 years?
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AuthorDeaundra S. Bonner Archives
February 2021
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